I'd like a number 1 with coke, please!
by psy001098121
Summary: A young witch's take on muggle fast food.


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Trina always saw herself as a good girl and upstanding witch, and she could never imagine herself doing anything criminal or naughty, but she had an embarrassing secret.

Wizards are human beings, too. And like all human beings, wizards have their own secret vices and guilty pleasures. This is especially true for adolescents, muggle and wizard alike.

Some wizards like to secretly horde adult magazines. Some like to sneak alcohol or cigars. Some like to wand graffiti. Some like to torture insects and little animals. Some like to bully younger wizards into giving up their nuts and sickles. Some like to peep into bathhouses.

Trina liked to eat muggle fast food.

It all started in her Muggle Studies class at Hogwarts.

As a muggle studies summer assignment, she was to write an essay on a type of popular muggle cuisine. It was easy for her to get hands on research, since she lived near a very large muggle community. Her family was predominantly pureblood, but they were practical minded enough to see that since they were surrounded by muggles they had a need to be familiar with muggle ways, so they blended in easily enough without suspicion.

When in doubt, dress in one color, her gramps would say.

In any case, one of her group friends dared her to try some of this muggle fast food that they had heard about, and Trina was terrified at the prospect. She did her research and knew the horrible things that fast food did to you. Not only did it give you horrible acne and give an unnatural luster to the skin, but also it contained poisons that raised your blood pressure and clogged up your bloodstream! Muggles have died eating muggle fast food!

But it would make excellent research, her friend insisted.

In the end, Trina found herself closing in on and staring fearfully at the golden arches that marked one of the most notorious and powerful fast food empires in the muggle world, McDonalds.

Further research into this McDonalds revealed that a clown ran the empire. A clown!

Fortunately, except for depictions, this clown was nowhere in sight, which was good. Trina was terrified of clowns.

Dressed casually in blue jeans and a blue jacket, Trina entered the establishment, where she saw a most shocking sight, but she did her best to hide it.

Muggles fed fast food to their children?

Actually, it seemed that muggles of all ages came to get this fast food. McDonalds had the air of a fun and casual social setting, like in a park or at someone's party, with so much chatter and bustling about.

Trina somehow expected seeing something more dark and shady in nature. McDonalds looked like a happy place. Certainly, no one here looked especially sickly or on the verge of dying.

Most of all, Trina found the smell most peculiar. The air smelled good and made her stomach gurgle, but it was unlike anything she had ever smelled at home or at Hogwarts. She was conflicted between horror and pleasure at the idea of eating here.

But how exactly was she supposed to eat here?

Looking around, Trina did the most logical thing and stood in line that led to the counters, and it was there that she got a good look at what must be the menu.

Those were some of the most bizarre sandwiches Trina had ever seen, and she could barely confidently identify what composed them. She read the labels, but some of them seemed misleading or full of nonsense. She was able to identify chicken in some of the meals, but she wasn't so sure of the others.

What the hell was a Big Mac?

Quickly she checked her pockets for her muggle money. She didn't bring a lot, because she didn't think that she'd eat heavily here. Checking her money, she knew that she had enough for one McDonalds sandwich.

Trina looked up again and stared at the Big Mac, and she knew that that's what she was going to try.

"Hi. Welcome to McDonalds. May I take your order?"

What a polite man. What's he doing working here?

"I'd like a Big Mac, please."

And with that, she was committed. After she got her change back she stood there not quite knowing what to do. However, it turns out that waiting is what she had to do, and she had to wait only a minute before she got her Big Mac.

It was fascinating to Trina. The service wasn't quite as fast as house elf cooking, but it was certainly faster than any wizard or witch she knew. She'll have to research how they put this meal together so fast.

Taking the small cardboard container and a napkin, she took an empty booth that offered her a bit of privacy and looked intently at her Big Mac before deciding to open it.

She somehow imagined the Big Mac to be, well, bigger.

Taking a good look at the sandwich, Trina felt her fears of fast food returning and uncertainty began taking hold, but so did salivating hunger. Up close, it actually looked delicious, and the fact that she didn't have lunch compounded the fact. But what if she got sick and died on the spot? Although, everyone else here is eating fast food and they look completely fine. Would it be any different with a witch?

Come on, do it for the research, the research, Trina kept repeating in her head, though the fact of the matter was that she was dared into doing this.

Dammit, it looked good.

Closing her eyes shut as she did so, Trina took hold of the Big Mac and bit into it, only to have her eyes pop open wide.

Merlin save her, but dear god, it tasted good.

Abandoning rational thought, Trina finished her Big Mac with delight. It was only after cleaning up and throwing away her trash that it sunk into her mind what she had done. Trina stood for a good ten nervous seconds before she knew that she wasn't turning sick in any way. Perhaps more time was needed.

She found herself wanting another Big Mac.

And then Trina realized the truth that her research didn't turn up. Muggle fast food was addictive! That's where the harm comes from!

In mild panic, Trina fled the McDonalds.

But great Merlin, it tasted good.

And so that's how it started and went on for the rest of her summer. From then on, Trina paid a visit to the McDonalds every week, for one meal. One meal a week was all that Trina would strictly allow herself. It was around this time that Trina's research determined that the negative effects of fast food could be simply counteracted with regular exercise. It was an incredible discovery. Exercise of all things!

Her family was initially curious as to why Trina suddenly took up exercising on a regular basis, but soon dismissed it as a desire for good health.

And Trina did exercise for her health. She exercised as if her life depended on it, which it may very well, according to her research on fast food. But she always looked forward to returning and eating more of this muggle fast food, and it was through her regular visits to McDonalds that she became intimately familiar with the many kinds of fast food served.

Mum and Dad would probably get mad if she knew where Trina ate her Thursday lunches during the summer.

She did get an A on her paper, though.

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End file.
